Coincidence, yes??

I dreamt of you last night, or more to just before I woke up. I dreamt of you coming back to me, I dreamt of us getting back together just like the old happy us. That's one of the thing that I really want at this moment, but I realise it was just a dream.

When I woke up, I saw a whatsapp message from you when I just opened my eyes. You messaged,"Dudut, u awake? Dudut?" and I replied,"Jz woke up" then you replied back,"Poo, come here.. ;(". I immediately got out of the bed and went to your room. Surprisingly your room door was already opened but you were lying down there. Something didn't seem right and I was correct, you were unwell, feeling sick. You told me that you felt very uncomfortable, very cold and neck pain. I checked and you had fever. I was very worried. I heated up the soup, added pepper, boiled water and brought everything into your room. I just wanted to make sure you were ok. I helped you to apply the Vicks to your body as well and you had some more rest. When helping you to apply Vicks, I realised at that moment, you were my old Nicholas, whom let go of the pride and needed me to be around. For once, I was glad that you were the same person, even if only when you were sick. I really miss the old you who was not to proud of yourself.

Out of nowhere, you asked me about the links for room. I was wondering what room you were talking about and you said the room that we wanted to share last time. I didn't expect that at all, was surprised instead. Somehow you make me wonder to myself, was it true that you wanted to look for room for us again. I don't know what was on your mind this morning. Did you really mean it? Or maybe you were sick and knew that you needed me around? Or maybe it was just a one time feeling because you thought you needed me around but then after you got better you forget about it? How I wish I can read your minds. I don't want to think too much now to prevent me getting hurt again, I'm very afraid of being hurt again therefore I distant myself from anything that possible to hurt me. How I wish you really mean it just now. How I wish you are still keen to look around for the room for us. 


Coincidence isn't it, my dream and what happened this morning? I don't want to hope too much. It was just a dream afterall. I don't want to confuse myself with the dream of us. Let the dream stays in the dreamland because we live in the reality, real world where everything is cruel. But I can't help but think to myself, will that time of us getting back together, happy together ever come true....

Counting down to one month time, 3 weeks to go... I have to get myself ready to get going >.< Just remember, even when I leave, it doesn't mean that I don't care. I care too much therefore I choose to leave....